This text
was printed in Arsenal: Surrealist Subversion, #3, Black Swan Press,
Chicago, 1976.
Dogs
are dirty, birds are filthy, fish are clean except for the intestines
which are dirty.
People
love to wash and that's why in the eyes of Jesus they are best. Dogs
don't go to heaven, they turn into worms, but good Christian people
stay just the same, younger and smelling good all the time. All the
people get washed when they die and sit at the table of Holy Lightning
with Jesus, eating all that clean food. Jesus smiles when he sees the
people washing. He knows that people like cleanliness and that's why
he likes them better than the animals who eat any crap dirty.
Clean people who don't smell like vinegar sit at His table, only younger,
with new hair, teeth and skin, all naked but not fornicating, eating
all that clean food. That's why it's important to get the old folks
soaped and combed and into bed between those nice sheets boiled four
times and ironed into nice even creases - twelve creases for Jesus -
and their toenails pared. Our old people look good, just simple people
the color of milk and veal roast. When it's time Jesus calls them, He
says: "O have you pared your nails?" And they answer: "O
yes, Sweet Lord, we have pared our nails and ironed our sheets twelve
times." And Jesus says: "Are you clean?" Which is a joke
because He knows that they are and the old folks laugh a lot at this.
And Jesus says: "Do you smell good and are you the color of veal
roast?" And the old folks answer: "O yes, Lord, we smell good
and we are clean and our thoughts are like white sauce and our blood
is like water and we are ready, O Sweet Jesus."
Then Jesus gathers them up in His arms and gives them clean teeth,
the better to eat at His Holy Table, and clean ears, the better to
hear His Holy Music, and clean eyes, the better to see and worship
Him.
